Thursday was my second chemo treatment, and I'm still feeling good. The tiredness is creeping in slowly, which is to be expected. I started the neupogen shots tonight, and they'll make me feel a little weird in a day or two. They're to boost my white blood cell production. Forgive me if I've said that before. I don't go back and reread my posts. Moving on to today and tomorrow... ;-)
I did get some good news at the doctor's visit. The tumor is smaller, the lymph nodes are smaller, and the texture of my breast is changing for the better. Not so much of a spider web feeling. Honestly, I'm not exactly sure what the last thing means, but the doc was happy, so I'm happy. I'm not an "ignorance is bliss" kind of person, but in the case of my breast cancer, my brain only holds so much at a time. Coping mechanism, I think.
So, now my hair is falling out. It's weird and oddly liberating at the same time. No $250 trips to the salon for cutting, highlighting, etc. for another year or so. I'm saving all the money to take a fabulous trip. Erik already booked our celebratory trip to Kauai for the end of October. What a wonderful husband I have!
Anyway, back to the hair. I recently read a couple articles about a treatment other women chemo warriors are doing where they freeze these head-shaped cold packs to this ungodly low temperature and then wear them all day long on the chemo day. It does seem to save their hair. But, really? I hate the cold. It's bad enough having to chew ice during chemo (to prevent mouth sores). I would NEVER get warm again if I had to wear that head thing. I understand the reasoning...you can't control a damn thing about this process. Working to save your hair gives you some control. But I do feel like I have control...I will decide when I shave my head (maybe tomorrow), and I picked out a fun wig. If anyone reading this blog ever goes through this, heaven forbid, don't let your hair define you. We spend tons of money altering our God-given hair anyway...spend another $350 on a wig, which your insurance will most likely reimburse, and get a no fuss new do
Getting back to the shrinking tumors, I strongly believe my visualizations help. Erik talked a lot about visualization when he was swimming for A.U. You visualize yourself going through the correct motions and winning. I know my Body Ninjas, Celtic Chemo Gals, and Cherokee Healers are a bit hokey, but they help me put a face on the fight. Those ladies are doing some serious battling and are winning. It's like a video game/movie in my head. Erik played a series of video games, Myst, with very awesome graphics and stories. So my visualizations are a cross between Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, The Lord of the Rings, and the mystic healers from Myst in a kinda' graphic novel style, if that makes ANY sense at all. ha ha ha! Anyway, I close my eyes and visualize the battle. I highly suggest visualization for anything. It helped me to loose weight, precancer, too. Lucky me, the anti-nausea meds can spur hunger. On that note...I'll say good night. Thanks to all who are following me on the journey.
No quote tonight. However, just a reminder that the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure is coming up on Saturday, June 4. I'll be there unless surgery interferes. It's a 5K, but I'm walking. This body is not going to be ready to run anywhere, I don't believe. LOL. I'll post the info for joining the team closer to the date. There's also an option to "Sleep in for the Cure." You pay the fee, and they send a t-shirt to you. Genius idea, if you think about it.
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